A Fevered Pitch

vicks-forehead-concept3I’ve written thousands of blog posts through the years and during that time, I’ve perhaps endorsed two or three products. K-Man has been sick the last few days, sporting the usual symptoms – high fever and petulant attitude. We knew he was burning up, but we couldn’t find the thermometer anywhere.

My hunch is that after the last fever he had, which was over a year ago, he hid the thermometer, or even threw it away. He’s a smart kid and after having his temperature taken – I hesitate to even type it – rectally, he was likely done. I’m sure at that moment he made himself a promise that he’d never have any objects placed into that body part again. Without his permission anyway.

So, with the thermometer missing, I went to the store to buy a new one. I was amazed at the number of choices I had. Back in the day when I was sick – there’s was basically one choice. Oh, sure, Mom offered the under the tongue method, but when you’re all stuffed up, it’s impossible to breathe through your noise. Roll over. Grin. And bear it. More often than not, Mom was like a phlebotomist who can’t find a vein. Poke. Poke. Poke. Pain. Pain. Pain.

I shook off the horrid memories, and went back to surveying the temperature-taking landscape. That’s when I found it. The thermometer (from Vick’s) that I’d heard about on the radio. Just swipe it over the forehead. No internal bleeding. No discomfort of any kind. (Even those ear probe things are a bit invasive.) It’s expensive, sure. But, I’m willing to take $50 out of K-Man’s college fund to avoid poking the kid.

K-Man’s temperature is back to normal now, but I still take his temperature five or six times a day. Because I can.

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